Come to Your Senses
by msjgatsby
Summary: PIKE story set at the end of Season 3
1. Look

The Drop is loud tonight. In an effort to draw in new clientele they've added a DJ and a dance floor. Paige is not in the mood. With Dale on the run, and the fate of Graceland uncertain, she feels betrayed her last vestige of familiarity would dare change. She heads to the bar where it's quieter, and grabs the stool next to Mike who's been nursing the same beer all night. Paige gives him a long lingering look as he sits facing the bar taking long sips from his drink. He's quiet tonight.

"You don't look at me like you used to."

The statement surprises them both. It's as though the words came out of nowhere. Well not nowhere. She's been noticing it for a while now. At first she felt too guilty to look at him, so she didn't notice. Then she did notice, but she attributed it to his drug use. But now Mike was clean, and he still didn't look at her the way he used to. She's beginning to worry he may never look at her that way again. Still, she wasn't expecting to say anything about it. There was so much they didn't talk about, why would she say that?

"What?" Mike asks, turning his head slightly, clearly just as startled by her blunt observation as she.

"You used to give me this look. I don't know how to describe it. It was like a look you only had for me. Charlie and Johnny mentioned it to me, but I never really noticed. That was just how you always looked whenever I saw you, so I thought it was how you normally looked, y'know? I really didn't realize it, until it was gone." Paige admits, stumbling over her words.

"I look at you." Mike says evenly. Even as he says the words his eyes are closed and he raises his beer to his lips to take another swig.

"Not like you used to." Paige argues.

"Well… Things have changed." Mike says simply, beginning to focus intently on peeling the label off his bottle.

"Right. Of course." Paige says awkwardly, bringing herself down from the bar stool and preparing to walk away. "Forget I said anything."

She can't believe she was stupid enough to bring it up. They hadn't talked about, well _them_ , in months. Not since she'd asked him what she meant to him and he'd told her that stupid fox story. So much had happened since then, but they'd never spoken of it again.

His hand on her wrist stops her from leaving and she looks down to where he's holding her.

"Do you want me to look at you?" He's looking at her now. Not with _the look,_ just looking confused and tired.

"No. I mean… I don't know. I just, I miss it sometimes. Not that I think we should get back together, I mean we were a disaster-" Paige babbles, and Mike nods stoically. He lets go of her wrist and turns back to his beer.

"Yeah…" He says dejectedly, his shoulders slumped.

"It's why I slept with you." She says, not answering his question, but somehow raising a thousand more. His eyebrows scrunch together and he looks even more confused than before. She continues hastily, "Yes, there were other reasons too, but mainly, it was that look."

She's dug herself in too deep to stop talking, so she figures she may as well bare it all and blame the booze later. Not that she is that drunk, but after how awkward this conversation is turning out, she had no doubt she would be soon.

"Right before you came back from DC, I was on a date and he took me to this art museum for this Frida Kahlo exhibit. I don't remember much of the art, or the guy for that matter, but there was this quote. She said, _Take a lover who looks at you like maybe you are magic._ " Paige smiles softly at the memory of the moment she first knew she wanted to be with Mike, "And I realized, the only person who ever looked at me that way was you."

Mike stares up at her, but the sadness in his eyes seems to cover any longing that used to be there.

"Sorry. I'm a little drunk. I'm not looking to change anything between us, I'm glad we're friends or whatever again, I just…" Paige takes another swig of her now empty beer and finishes lamely, "I just thought you should know."

Grabbing her new beer, she turns to leave Mike at the bar to go recover some of her dignity. She needs about two more shots and a dance with a stranger. That should do the trick.

"I still think you're magic." Mike says softly. Over the loud beat of the music, she doesn't hear his soft confession as she walks away.

"What's got you down, Mikey?" Charlie asks, coming up behind Mike, sitting down in Paige's chair and running her fingers through his hair playfully. He seems to be brooding tonight.

"Nothing." He doesn't put much effort into the lie, and his eyes drift in Paige's direction on the dance floor. Charlie follows his gaze knowingly and nods.

"So you finally going to tell me what happened with you two?" Charlie asks, having never heard the full story. Obviously something big went down between the two agents, but neither talked about it.

"Same thing that always happens these days. I ruined everything." Mike takes another swig of his drink. "I used to be good, y'know? Now… everything I do ends up hurting people."

"You're still good, Mikey. Sometimes we try our best and people get hurt." Charlie assures him.

"I'm a junkie." Mike says bitterly.

"Have you taken drugs today?" Charlie demands.

"No, of course not!" Mike scoffs.

"Yesterday?" Charlie follows up.

"No!" Mike says, a little offended at what she's implying.

"Anything stronger than this beer since you detoxed?" Charlie asks, picking up his Miller lite he'd been nursing all night and shakes it at him.

"No." Mike says, softly now seeing what she's doing.

"Then you're not a junkie. You're in recovery." Charlie says. She nods out to where Paige is dancing in the middle of where a crowd of men are forming around her, none of whom are brave enough to approach her, "You don't think _that's_ a good enough reason to stay clean?"

"It's not that." Mike says, gazing over longingly as Paige danced.

"Then what?" Charlie asks.

"I don't trust myself." Mike admits.

"Listen sad-eyes, I know you're crazy about that girl. So you've made mistakes. So what? It's not over until you stop trying."

"Is that what happened with Briggs?" Mike turns the attention away from himself and back to Charlie.

"You let me worry about Briggs. We're talking about you here, Mikey. Do you love her?" Charlie voices the words no one else has been brave enough or blunt enough to say.

"Yeah." Mike admits easily, "That's why I have to let her go. Everything I touch turns to shit."

"Well that's a load of crap." Charlie says bluntly. "If you love her, just tell her. Life's too short. Y'know?"

"It's not that simple." Mike sighs, his fingers clenching around the bottle.

"It could be if you just told her." Charlie argues.

"You have no idea. Nothing is ever simple with us." Mike says bitterly.

"So who ended things? You or her? Did you two ever officially break up?" Charlie asks, and Mike thinks back to the moment Sid Markum told him it was Paige who gave him up. They were probably over sometime before that, as much as Mike hates to admit it, but up until that moment he had hope she would forgive him.

"We were never officially together." Mike laughs hollowly, staring into his empty beer bottle as though more will magically appear. When Charlie fixes him with a hard not-buying-it glare, he sighs, "I… I did something. I did a lot of things… I messed up Charlie."

"So go fix it." Charlie says bluntly.

"I can't." Mike whines. "She doesn't want me… not anymore. I blew it."

"Ugh. You two are pathetic." Charlie rolls her eyes grabbing her drink and standing up in a huff.

"Finally something we agree on- Where are you going?"

"I'm going to fix it!" Charlie calls back over her shoulder as she goes to talk some sense into the other party.

"Charlie no! Leave it! It's fine! Fuck, there she goes." Mike drops his head into his arms. This was just not his year.


	2. Touch

"Charlie! Want to dance with me?" Paige smiles even brighter, ignoring the tall drunk guy who has just approached her from behind to attempt grind against her in a sorry attempt for a dance without extending the courtesy of asking permission. Paige swats him away like a fly and reaches for Charlie.

"Nope. I don't want to dance. I want that lemon french toast thing Mikey makes." Charlie says, taking Paige's hand and pulling her further away from the disappointed man behind her. "Which means I need you to take that sorry boy at the bar home and do whatever it is you do to him that makes him cheery enough to make it from scratch. Not frittatas, no pancakes, I want french toast with lemon curd. I'll even get up early and go get raspberries for it from the farmers market."

"Those days are over Charlie." Paige says not unkindly, looking over to where Mike was nervously trying to look like he was not watching the interaction between the two women.

"You two need to talk. Really talk." Charlie insists seriously, "Before it's too late. With Dale gone, who knows how long they're gonna keep Graceland running."

"We don't know what's going to happen with the house and Mike and I are fine." Paige rolls her eyes at Charlie, beginning to sway her hips again. "We can be in the same room again. What more do you want?"

"I either want you two to work through your shit and get back together, or to let each other go and move on."

"Well then all settled. We've both moved on." Paige shrugs.

"Yeah, I can tell by the way he's crying into his beer over there and you're out here dancing like you want revenge." Charlie says sarcastically. "Oh, here comes our boy now."

"Hey, I think I'm just going to head back early. Get some sleep so I can be fresh for tomorrow's search party." Mike says, looking at his feet and hoping that Paige realizes Mike didn't ask Charlie to interfere here.

"Like a sign from God!" Charlie exclaims as the fast club music switches to a slower romantic beat and people start coupling off on the dance floor. She grabs Mike and Paige and pulls them closer together. Charlie takes Paige's empty beer from her hand to make sure she can have her hands free to put on Mike. "Dance! Talk! I'm gonna go grab the next round."

Mike and Paige still hesitate, looking at each other awkwardly until Charlie fixes them with a glare. Paige grabs Mike's half empty beer bottle to finish it off before Charlie can confiscate that too, figuring she's going to need all the liquid courage she can get. She nearly spits it out in surprise when she's met with the taste of water rather than booze. She looks up at Mike curiously and Charlie grabs the bottle and shoves Paige forward. Mike catches Paige to stop her from stumbling, his hands resting on her waist. Charlie smiles, pleased with her work, and heads back to the bar to give them a moment.

Once she's out of earshot, Paige looks up to where Mike is stubbornly staring over her shoulder.

"Water?" She asks with an eyebrow raised.

"It's not a big deal. I just don't want to take any risks with…" Mike says evenly, glad she didn't out his complete sobriety to Charlie.

"I get it." Paige says simply. She hadn't meant to embarrass him with it. Addiction was no joke, and Mike staying sober for a few months while he dealt with his demons probably wasn't a bad idea. "Good for you."

"Let's just dance." Mike says, trying to shut down whatever she might say about it.

He can't shake the embarrassment of her seeing him in the throws of addiction. He remembers her brushing his sweaty hair back as he heaved into a trash can and called her a battery of disgusting names he didn't mean. No matter how much better he gets, she's always going to have that memory. She's never going to see him as she did the night she dropped her towel and her defenses for him.

"Fine, we can dance, but none of these eighth grade formal, leave-room-for-Jesus, moves you're pulling." Paige says, stepping into the carefully held space between them he's formed. She brings her hands up from his arms to around his neck and tucks in closer to him until her whole body is pressed up to his. She rests her head on his shoulder and their bodies sway in time to the music.

"I didn't know you could dance." She murmurs into his chest, after a minute of him leading her through the steps with more experience than she expected.

Another minute of just the two of them holding each other, swaying in time to the music, passes easily. Her hair tickles Mike's cheek, but he doesn't dare move it away for fear of breaking the moment.

"This is nice." Mike observes, and wonders if saying it aloud crosses some invisible boundary.

"Yeah." Paige agrees, pulling him a little closer, "How have we never done this before?"

"I wanted to." Mike admits. When his admission is not met with objection, he volunteers a bit more information, "When I was under with Bello, there was this club he used to frequent that struck me as a place I thought you'd like. I always meant to show it to you."

"You wanted to take me dancing?" Paige looks up at him with an amused grin. She often forgot Mike, underneath all the FBI protocol and seriousness, was a bit of an old soul romantic.

"I wasn't sure if that was ok with our... arrangement." Mike still isn't sure what to call what they had together. They'd never defined it.

"Yeah... I can see why you didn't." Paige says somberly.

"If I had asked you... Would you have gone with me?" Mike asks, trying to keep his tone casual, though he knows he's steering them into the dangerous territory of what-if's.

"Maybe." Paige answers vaguely, looking up at him with a look he can't decipher, "I guess we'll never know."

"What you said earlier." Mike brings the subject back up, ready to address it, "About me not looking at you..."

"Can we forget I said anything? I'm sure I'm just being-" Paige gives an embarrassed laugh.

"No, you're right." Mike says, not letting her brush it off, "I don't look at you like that anymore because... it hurts too much."

"I'm sorry." Paige apologizes immediately.

She's never fully had the words to apologize for her actions. She still didn't, and Mike had been so gracious about everything, that she'd started to believe maybe they could actually get passed it without her forcing it. His admission now confirms what she knew, that she may not have killed him, but she had certainly killed any chance for them to be together. He would ever look at her that way again.

She buries her head into his chest hoping she can maybe be more articulate without having to look at him, and she begins to grovel, "I'm so so sorry. I know no amount of apologizing for what I did will-"

"It's not that, Paige. It hurts to look at you because," Mike takes a deep breath, "It hurts to see what I used to have and can't have again, and know it's all my fault."

Paige looks up at him, speechless, all the words of her unsaid apology still choking her.

"I don't feel like I have the right to look at you anymore." He leans in, and presses his cheek against hers.

His ear is right there. Right next to her lips. She should fill it with assurances that she is just as much to blame for their downfall, and a thousand other things she wishes she could change about the past. Instead she just takes a deep breath and whispers, "So, don't look. Let's just close our eyes and dance."

"Ok." Mike agrees, his fingers tightening around the small of her back.

Another slow dance song begins to play and Mike wonders if Charlie paid off the DJ. The two don't talk the entire dance, they just sway back and forth in the familiar comfort of each other's arms. After that the music inevitably picks up again and Paige knows she needs to open her eyes again. They can't stay like this forever, pressed against each other with their eyes closed to all their problems. She pulls away with a shy smile and turns to walk away, but Mike catches her hand and spins her into him.

"Wait, you _actually_ know how to dance?" Paige asks, as Mike begins to lead her with impressive confidence in time with the new faster song.

"You know I went to prep school right? Dancing was a required class." Mike gives her a familiar smirk, not missing a beat.

"I didn't think you'd know how to mambo!" Paige laughs.

"Oh I was at the top of _all_ of my classes." Mike assures her dipping her back. "I can even weave a handbasket."

"No, you cannot." Paige squeals in delight at this image.

"I can. It's sitting on my mom's fireplace." Mike says proudly as he leads her around the dance floor.

"Is that where you learned to make french toast?" Paige asks.

"No, that was born from the internet and the need to impress overnight guests." Mike admits, in a tone that almost makes Paige think he's flirting he asks, "Did it work?"

"Well it impressed someone…" Paige smiles, (he was definitely flirting) "Charlie was asking."

"I might be able to arrange that." Mike spins Paige in against him tightly. "I probably I owe her for something."

"She's going to be really smug after this." Paige says, looking over to where Charlie is looking at the two of them with barely contained glee.

"Well, a win's a win." Mike quotes Paige back to herself, "So not to change topics, but can I talk to you about something investigation related?"

"Please." Paige says. This dancing and flirting is new territory she's completely unfamiliar with and wasn't expecting tonight. She thought it would takes months of grovelling and angst, probably a few more times of her jealously watching Mike date someone again, and definitely several more screaming fights before they got to this point. Now that she's here she feels a little dizzy. The change of pace to something familiar like discussing cases is welcome. More than anything with Mike, she's missed them confiding in each other.

"I don't trust Briggs." Mike murmurs in her ear as he pulls her close under the disguise of dancing. "We have to find Dale before he does. I have a lead on where he might be. Tomorrow can you go on a ride along with me?"

"I'd love to." Paige says honestly.

"Ok. Um, great." Mike says, relieved and clearly thinking that would require more effort. "So, we should probably head out then. I'll have to get up early if we're going to beat Briggs out. Plus, I owe Charlie that french toast."

"Maybe head out after one more song?" Paige asks, as the music shifts again.

"Ok." Mike says unable to deny her anything as he shifts his hand lower on her back. "Just one more dance."

They were clearly unable to let go of each other just yet.


	3. Taste

"What? What is that look?" Mike doesn't remove his eyes from the binoculars he's using to survey the truck stop, when he asks Paige. He doesn't need to. He can feel the weight of her eyes on him. He feels like this whole stakeout, she's been staring at him more than she's been looking at the spot they're supposed to be surveying.

"Nothing… I was just thinking back to that first time we were investigating Briggs." Paige says, pulling her knee up to her chest and leaning back in the passenger seat of Mike's car looking up through the skyroof.

"...And you're wondering how two years later he's still two steps ahead of us?" Mike grumbles, "First Briggs. Now Dale. Next it's gonna be Charlie."

"No. Well yes, but no. I was just thinking about how familiar this feels. It's kind of… nice." Paige finishes lamely.

"Nice?" Mike scoffs, because he feels like they've been stuck in this car for hours without a single suspicious activity, and he's starting to wonder if Briggs found a way to sneak him bad intel to send him on a goose chase again.

"Yeah... I missed this." Paige says picking at the frayed hole in the knee of her jeans.

"You missed _this_?" Mike turns and gives her a pointed look. How could she miss feeling like they were eight steps behind while a housemate betrays them.

"It's just, I forgot how much I like working with you is all." Paige shrugs.

"Oh." Mike is caught off guard by her almost sentimental statement. Suddenly he's thinking less about the case and more about them. She was right. This felt so familiar, he'd almost forgotten they'd somewhat been flirting last night. At least, he hoped they had been.

Paige uses his shocked silence to take the binoculars from Mike's hands and focus on the entrance of the small diner of the truck stop across the street from where their car is parked.

"Is Charlie right? Should we talk about it? ...Us?" Mike asks quietly, adding the last word almost hopefully, though it sounds foreign on his tongue.

"Forget it. It was stupid of me to- Just forget I said anything." Paige felt like she was saying this a lot to Mike recently. Why did her guard keep slipping? She kept finding herself saying things to him with no actual thought as to the consequences. "What time did your source say he last saw Jakes?"

"So we're just going to focus on work and act like everything's normal?" Mike asks, staring straight ahead out the windshield, not really focusing on anything.

"Mmmhmm…" Paige murmurs in agreement as she adjusts the focus on the binoculars again.

"And what happens when this is all done? Once we find Jakes? Then what?" Mike asks, looking at his hand gripping around the steering wheel.

"Don't worry. We'll find another catastrophe to distract ourselves with." Paige mutters wryly.

"So, we're just never going to talk about this?" Mike's getting frustrated as he watches his knuckles turning white on the wheel.

"I'm sure we will as soon as the catastrophe's stop coming." Paige says flippantly, refusing to lower the binoculars even if there's nothing to see.

"Which roughly translated is never." Mike rolls his eyes.

"Don't be dramatic. It has to stop eventually. But look at the bright side, we may not both survive that long." Paige says in a dry tone, finally lowering the binoculars to give him a humourless smirk.

He laughs bitterly and reaches over to take back his binoculars, but before he can pull away Paige leans over too and lightly presses her lips to his for the briefest of moments.

"What was that for?" Mike asks, surprised when she pulls back but he remains leaning toward her.

"I was just thinking, if we don't survive, the last person I kissed was Toros." Paige admits, adjusting herself in the seat and facing forward again. "I didn't want that."

"But, you're sure you don't want to talk about it…" Mike double checks, confused by her mixed messages.

"No. There's too much happening with Jakes missing, and Briggs being shady as fuck and… it's just too much right now, Mike." Paige sighs.

"Ok… but if you ever want to talk about it... Paige, I'd like to." Mike tells her honestly.

She says nothing but takes the binoculars back from him again and looks out trying to get them to focus again just for something to do with her hands. He sits there, watching her, and wonders if he just missed a very important moment, or if should let it go. He's staring openly at her like a puzzle he needs to solve, when suddenly he sees her lips curving into a cheshire cat like smile.

"You're smiling." Mike reminds her in case she doesn't know.

"You're giving me that look again." Paige says, biting her lip to try to tamper her smile as she feels the familiar weight of his gaze on her. This was the look she's missed all along, and it's back and it feels like the sun is shining on her.

"Sorry, I'll stop." Mike says, without diverting his eyes in the least.

"You're not stopping." Paige puts down the binoculars and turns to return his gaze, still smiling. She's missed his staring so.

"I'm not stopping." Mike says his voice dropping to a husky tone and his eyes dropping to her lips as he slowly leans in, giving her enough time to pull away if she needs to. When she doesn't pull back, he takes her face in his hand and kisses her deeply. The kiss is much longer than the innocent peck Paige laid on him moments before, and it's only when his lungs start screaming at him for air that he pulls away.

"What was that for?" She repeats his question back to him, her eyes fluttering open to stare at him curiously. Her heart beating faster, as he continues to lean in close.

"Well, if we're going to die without ever talking about it, I want yours to be the last lips I kissed too." Mike says breathlessly as his fingers lightly play with a stray hand of hair that's fallen from her ponytail. "There's always going to be catastrophes, Paige."

"Let's just focus on finding Jakes first." Paige says, with a small smile remaining on her kiss stung lips. She knows he's right, but she also knows that they should probably try to save the house and their jobs before they even approach such a delicate topic as whether they were an us. And they certainly shouldn't do it on a stakeout. They were professionals after all.

"Yeah, ok." Mike sighs, knowing she's right as he leans back in his seat of the car, resting his hands on the steering wheel to keep himself to from reaching for the blonde woman just a seat away. They sit in silence together for a moment, both trying to calm themselves down and not think about how small the car felt with the weight of all the unsaid things in it.

"What are the chances that Jakes might be hiding at that club of Bello's you were talking about the other night? The one with the dancing?" Paige finally breaks the silence, but her question is shy.

"Slim." Mike says, staring at her very cautiously. "But maybe we should check it out just in case. Friday?"

"Yeah. Just to make sure." Paige says distractedly.

She's distracted because Mike is staring at her again with that look, and he's so close she forgot how that look effected her when she was caught in it's direct path. He was definitely her headlight. She finds her eyes dropping from his gaze and back to his lips which seem to be moving closer to her own. Suddenly he's kissing her again, and then he's fumbling with undoing his seatbelt. Once he's free from the constraints, he lunges across the stick at Paige, one hand braced against the window behind her and one hand under her shirt. She kisses him back her hands coming up under his shirt to grip his back and ass, the uncomfortable angle of the car ignored for a minute as they clumsily grasp at each other.

All thoughts of professionalism are gone. Yes they should talk about this, but not talking about things and just falling into each other has become their MO and it's so much easier. They kiss desperately, the windows beginning to steam even on the warm day with their heavy breaths.

"Fuck." Mike swears as the shift keeps interfering with his need to get closer to her. He fumbles around behind her until he finds the latch that pushes Paige's chair back.

"Mike." Paige moans his name as she falls backwards in her reclined seat, refusing to let go of him and kissing him as she goes, half pulling him on top of her.

"Get in the backseat." He instructs what he wants even as he's trying to lift her in that direction. Paige nods in complete agreement, scooting herself backwards while trying to take off his belt and kiss him at the same time.

His phone starts buzzing loudly where it was left in the cupholder, making both of them jump.

"Ignore it." Mike says, his eyes dilated and his breathing heavy, but Paige already is reaching for it, and Mike sighs in defeat sitting back in his seat as she answers.

"Hey Charlie. Nope. Everything's good here. No nothing exciting, I don't think he's gonna show. What? You've got eyes on Courtney? Is Jakes with her? Well what about Briggs? What do you mean he's on the move? No, I know you can't tail them both. Which direction did Briggs head in? We're not far. We'll head that way. You stay on her. Be safe."

"Another catastrophe?" Mike sighs, already buckling his seatbelt and turning on the car.

"Always." Paige says buckling herself in as well.

"Let's go then." Mike says, putting the car in reverse and backing out.

Paige rolls down the window to let some air and the real world back into the car. She feels somewhat relieved that they were interrupted and at the same time somewhat frustrated. Even though she started it, those kisses blurred the line, and now Friday they had what? A date? Paige doesn't know what Mike's looking for, or even what she wants. For right now, they'll focus on finding Jakes and then maybe once this is all over she'll have a better idea of what her and Mike are doing. Or maybe he'll start dating someone else again, like he always does, or he'll move back to DC or maybe- She needs to get out of her head. Focus on Jakes and Briggs.

"So it looks like Briggs is up to his normal tricks. Guess some things never change." Mike says bitterly of his former mentor.

"Well you know what they say, no rest for the wick-" Paige stops talking suddenly and looks down at her hand in her lap. A hand that is casually being held by Mike's right hand as he stares out the window and uses his left to steer. She looks up at him questioningly.

He glances over from behind his shades at her guiltily, and sees her staring at him. Training his eyes back on the road, he continues driving like everything's normal. Lacing his fingers through hers, to prove he knows exactly what he's doing, he continues to watch the road and says in an even, but nervous, tone, "Don't overthink it. Let's just take it one catastrophe at a time."

Paige looks down at their joined hands for a moment before relaxing back in her seat and staring out the window hiding a small smile as she lets him hold her hand.

"One catastrophe at a time."


	4. Listen

"So you found Briggs?" Mike asks into his phone, as he peaks out the window of his hotel room at the setting sun in Dubai.

"Yeah we got him back. He's a little worse for wear but we found him before the gang took any limbs." Paige answers into her phone back at Graceland, looking over from the dining area to where Briggs is sitting on the couch with Charlie.

"So he wasn't screwing us?" Mike says, still not sure he buys the whole story that Briggs wasn't somehow involved in Jakes' escape to the Island in Dubai Mike had tracked him down to.

"Nope, just trying to once again run another angle he didn't feel like telling us about. What good is living in Graceland if you don't tell your team what the plan is?" Paige scoffs.

"Well, keep an eye on him, ok? Something just doesn't feel right." Mike says, reaching into the mini fridge for a water.

"You always say that about Briggs." Paige grins as she holds the phone to here ear and balances on the edge of the dining room table. "How's the hunt in Dubai going?"

"Not much yet. My plane landed just half an hour ago. It's too late to get much now, so I'm just going to try to sleep off this jet lag, and get a fresh start in the morning. He's here though. I have that feeling."

"Ok, well I'll let you get some rest then." Paige tells him, "Call me tomorrow when you know more."

"Don't hang up yet." Mike stops her from her attempts at a goodbye. As soon as the words are out, he worries he sounded too needy.

"Ok. I can't talk too long, Johnny's due back now with Hector's at any moment, but I can stay on a little longer…" Paige agrees, not quite ready to say goodbye yet either.

"I've got time, if you want to have that talk." Mike says, wondering if Paige might feel more comfortable talking about them when there's an entire ocean separating them physically.

After they'd chased down Courtney they'd discovered that she was on her way to an Island off of Dubai, a nonextradition country, presumably to meet Jakes. Charlie, Paige and Johnny stayed behind to try to locate Briggs who had gone off the grid. Apparently he had tried to cut Jakes off using his contacts in a local Mexican street gang but had gotten in over his head. Mike had to leave before they located him, catching the next flight to Dubai to chase down Jakes. It had all happened so fast Mike hadn't had any time to talk to Paige about what happened between them in the car, but a sixteen hour airplane ride alone with his thoughts gave him plenty of time to obsess about it.

"Mike, I can't right now." Paige knows Mike wants to talk about them, but she's not ready yet. She needs time to think about what she wants to say, plus she's not completely alone in the house and doesn't need her housemates eves dropping. "Briggs and Charlie are here and I don't think..."

"Ok… then I'll talk and you can listen. Tell me when I go too far. Green. Yellow. Red." Mike says, pushing the issue.

"Fine." Paige sighs in agreement.

"You're supposed to say 'green'." Mike reminds her.

"Ok Simon-Says, 'green'." Paige rolls her eyes with a grin.

"You would love this island. It's stunning." Mike says, starting her off easy as he stares out the window of his hotel room.

"Green." Paige smiles at his game, looking over to where Briggs and Charlie are reviewing a file, completely ignoring her.

"I can see why Jakes would take Courtney here. It's got all these beautiful ocean views. It's the most romantic place I've ever seen." Mike continues on with idle chit-chat.

"Green." Paige smiles.

"The bed's super comfortable too. I wish you were here with me." Mike presses his luck.

"Yellow." Paige is still smiling, as she calls him on it.

"Ok, as beautiful as this island is, I'm homesick." Mike rephrases.

"Green." Paige accepts his correction.

"I miss you." Mike says softly.

"Yel- ok, greenish." Paige hesitates and changes her mind.

"I've been thinking about you a lot recently." Mike says cautiously, and before Paige can respond he continues, "I keep thinking about what happened the other day in the car."

"..." There's a brief moment of silence as Mike waits for the 'red' he knows is coming. He's starting to wonder if maybe she just hung up on him, when he hears her ask softly,

"And?" Paige forgets the game momentarily, wanting to hear more of what he has to say about it.

"And I'm sorry I won't be there to take you out dancing on Friday." Mike smiles that she didn't stop him.

"Well the case is more important…" Paige wipes at a smudge on the countertop.

"If I could change things between us, what happened, I would." Mike says resolutely, leaning forward on the bed he's sitting on the edge of. She hasn't stopped him yet, and he's going to keep pushing as far ahead as he can.

"Like what?" Paige keeps her responses vague, glancing over again towards where Paul and Charlie are still chatting.

"I wouldn't have come in that first night." Mike says resolutely, like he's thought about this a lot.

"Oh?" Paige arches an eyebrow, Mike's answer taking her off guard.

"Not right then. I would have finished my phone call. Really finished it. All of it. I would have made it clear to Jess then and there it was over." Mike says with determination, trying to make Paige believe how sincere his words are.

"Mike…" Paige knows they're getting into dangerous territory and tries to cut him off.

"And then when I hung up the phone with Jess, I would have called you." Mike's answer once again surprises Paige.

"What?! You were literally outside my door. You could have just knocked. Hell both the literal and metaphorical doors were wide open..." Paige catches herself saying too much, and glances over to where Charlie and Briggs still don't appear to care who or what she's speaking to.

"Yes, and I would have called, because I remember exactly how things would have gone if I knocked." Mike says with a cocky grin she can practically hear through the phone.

"What do you remember?" Paige's grin matches Mike's.

"I remember everything." Mike assures her, pausing just enough to let her imagination drift to the events of that night.

"I'm hazy on the details, refresh my memory?" Paige teases breathlessly.

"You walked by. I wanted to talk to you, but I was on the phone and figured you were heading to bed. Then you dropped your towel, and I couldn't breathe. I told myself it had to be a mistake. You forgot to close the door, or didn't know I was still out there... but part of me knew this was you. Nothing you do is a mistake. So I went to your door and...the look you gave me Paige. Fuck." Closing his eyes he can still see her standing in front of him staring at him enchantingly.

"And then?" Paige teases, and Mike smiles, because he did not intend for this conversation to turn into phone sex, but it seems that's exactly what she wants. He briefly considers undoing his pants and granting her wish.

"I kissed you. And this time, you didn't stop me, or tell me I was lost or whatever bullshit excuse you gave me the summer before. This time, I kissed every inch of you and I didn't stop kissing you until you were breathless and begging laying on that gray throw on your bed. Remember? Your thighs over my shoulders. Your fingers gripping my hair as I devoured you, which I did, until you were _begging_ me to take my clothes off and join you on the bed." Mike says wickedly, wanting her to remember in vivid detail their first night together. He can't brag about it to others, but he can to her and he's very proud that he managed to get her off three times that night before he removed even an article of his own clothing.

"I did not beg." Paige whispers into the phone, angling her body away from her roommates so they can't see the flush of her cheeks.

"Oh as I recall you begged. Repeatedly. What do you remember?" Mike asks her lustily, and yeah this was definitely going to turn into phone sex. Even miles apart from each other it seems they can't control themselves.

"Not much, it was over so fast." Paige teases sarcastically, trying to lighten the mood and poking at his ego just a bit.

"Liar." Mike calls her out with a smile, "We were at it all night. And I know that, because I remember the way you look naked above me with the sun rising behind you. Most beautiful thing I've ever seen..."

"Fine, that night was incredible." Paige admits.

"And lasted an impressive length of time which required a very skilled lover with great stamina." Mike continues on for her.

"You know you're good in bed, Mike." Paige rolls her eyes.

"It wouldn't kill you to say it every now and then." Mike playfully pouts.

"Fine. You are a sex god." Paige says dryly, before her voice drops to a soft serious tone, "But that night aside, everything was over too soon, Mike."

"I know." Mike agrees sadly, "If I had known… well, anyway. In my new version, I wouldn't have come in, even though finding the willpower to resist might have killed me."

"Yeah… probably for the best." Paige leans up against the wall wondering how things might have been different and if she would have given up the memory of those few weeks with Mike for the ability to change what happened after.

"In my new version, I would have known better than to come in and I would have called. I would have called and asked you out on a date. A real date." Mike says, clearing his throat and beginning to pace his room nervously, while trying to sound confident.

"You are so cheesy!" Paige laughs at his change in tone, not believing for a second in any reality Mike would have not come to her bed that night, "Ok, so then what happens in this new version of yours? Do we go split a milkshake at the sock hop?"

"No, you would have said no." Mike says confidently.

"Really?" Paige rolls her eyes.

"Yeah, you'd never give in that easily. You'd call me 'cheesy'. Reminded me how I was only here a short time, and all the reasons why us dating would complicate things, but tell me if I wanted a fling your door was open." Mike says, not sounding the least bit bothered by this imaginary response from Paige.

"And that would be it?" Paige smiles, knowing it's not.

"Oh hell no. I would have then proceeded to woo you so covertly you wouldn't even realize we were in a relationship until about a month in." Mike says with a cocky grin.

"How?" Paige laughs.

"You wouldn't see it coming. I'd say I needed you to go undercover as my fiance for a case, but it would start bleeding over into real life, until you'd start questioning whether I was sending flowers as part of the cover or because you had a big breakthrough in one of your cases, or just because."

"This is your way of romancing women. Making them work extra shifts going under with dangerous felons?" Paige rolls her eyes.

"Not women. You." Mike grins. "You would have loved it. The thrill of the undercover work. We would start kissing out in the field and eventually we'd be renting motel rooms and turning off our coms."

"That's your grand plan to fix the past? A phone call and a newlywed undercover play?" Paige giggles.

"There's so much I would change. I would have supported you more when it came to finding your girls. You still might not have had the backup you wanted, but I would have been there instead of Jakes. You would have never been taken." Mike's voice takes on a serious tone as the mood shifts.

"If I wasn't taken, how would we have found them?" Paige asks softly, because even looking back she knows some things were inevitable.

"We would have a found a way. Together." Mike assures her. "We're such a good team, Paige."

"Mike, there wasn't another way." Paige slips behind the wall out of sight of Charlie and Briggs and whispers softly into the phone. "If you could go back. Knowing what you know now. Would you have taken Lena instead of me?"

Mike hesitates as he considers how to word his answer.

"Mike?" Paige prompts softly.

"No." Mike finally answers honestly. "I choose you. Every time. And I know that's not the answer you want, but I won't apologize for it, because I'm not sorry. I choose you, Paige… Paige I… I love you."

"..."

"Paige?" Mike grips the phone closer sitting up nervously in his bed.

"..."

"Paige are you still there?" Mike asks nervous at her silence.

"..." There's still no reply but Mike hears her breathing over the line.

"Red?" Mike asks her knowingly.

"Red." Her voice comes back choked.

"I'm sorry. I know… I know now's not the time to say it. I should have said it earlier. I tried." Mike can't go back now that he's finally said the words.

"When?" Paige's voice still sounds hoarse.

"So many times. I nearly blurted it out the first time I met you." Mike stumbles over his words, hoping she doesn't hang up the phone.

"What?" Paige asks, trying to remember how she could have missed it.

"We were in the bathroom. I asked why you didn't get out from your case, and you said 'because you wanted the bastard'. I knew I loved you right then and there. I should have told you. Maybe not right then but… I should have told you sooner than now." A part of Mike feels relief at finally having the words out in the open. It was one less secret between them.

"Why didn't you?" Paige asks softly.

"I was scared you didn't feel the same way." Mike sinks back into the bed, his voice as soft as hers.

"And you're not afraid of that anymore?" Paige asks.

"No, I'm pretty much terrified, but I figure, how much worse can things get?" Mike says with a bitter laugh.

"Well, that's true." Paige agrees her voice sounding sad. There's a pause as they both sit silently in the weight of the moment.

"Are you ever going to be able to look at me and not… not be reminded of her?" Mike finally asks, because at this point the cards are on the table.

"Yes." Paige answers honestly, "I don't know if I'll ever be able to look at myself in the mirror and not be reminded, but I don't think of Lena when I look at you anymore."

"When you see me... What do you think about?" Mike asks, softly.

"About what I did to you." Paige's voice shakes, and it sounds like she may start crying. "About what if you hadn't survived. How sorry I am."

"I told you, I don't care about that. I forgive you, Paige. If that's what's holding you back from this… don't let it." Mike pleads.

"Johnny's here with the food. I gotta go." Paige says, wiping away the tears that are threatening to fall.

"Yeah, ok." Mike says, realizing this is as far as he's going to get today. "I'll see you in a couple days. The island's not that big. Not too many places for Jakes to hide."

"Ok. Be safe." Paige says, trying to regain her composure.

"Yeah, you too." Mike says, and Paige hangs up the phone.

"I love you." Mike says to the disconnected line.


	5. Scent

Mike walks into Graceland and drops his bag on the couch in the living room. He doesn't have the energy to drag the bag up the stairs. He's not even sure he has the energy to make it up the stairs himself. Mike has been up for 76 hours, and is incredibly jet lagged. He didn't dare sleep on the plane with Jakes' handcuffed beside him. Then there was all the paperwork he had to fill out down at the station, and now he's finally home and it's four am.

He looks around the quiet house before he trudges up the stairs. When he reaches the top stair, he looks between his door and Paige's. His desire for his bed and his need to see her duel within him. He sees her door is cracked open and that makes up his mind for him. He walks to her room and peaks inside, telling himself he just needs to see her sleeping form before he can sleep himself. He won't wake her, he'll just see her once before he goes to his own bed.

A wave of disappointment washes over him when he sees her bed empty and unslept in. A momentary flash of panic rips through his sleepy haze as he relives the moment when he first discovered she was missing at Sylmar. He stumbles back, catching himself on the couch in the sitting area at the top of the stairwell. He sits down, unable to stand any longer and logically goes through the mental steps required to calm himself down.

He knows she wasn't working yesterday, so chances of her getting snatched on her day off were slim. Plus he'd run into Charlie at the station when his plane first landed and she would have told him if Paige was missing. She was probably ok… which just meant… she wasn't sleeping in her bed. She hadn't fallen asleep on the couch or he would have seen her, so that just meant… She had hooked up last night and was sleeping somewhere else.

Mike hates the thought, but it's the most logical solution. He'd talked to Johnny last night before the plane boarded. He said they were all heading out to the Drop to celebrate Mike catching Jakes. Paige hadn't called him since he'd confessed he loved her on the phone the other night, and Mike had been too scared to call her back. He'd blown it. He'd freaked her out and she'd gone out to hook up as a passive aggressive way to avoid dealing with it. He should have known she'd do something like this. It was a common pattern for her. The first time they'd been getting too close, she'd thrown him at Abby. Then again at Jess a second time. This had to be her way of telling him she just wasn't interested in him.

Mike punches the sofa before sinking back into it defeated. It's almost dawn. If he stays here much longer he'll have to witness her get laid parade. Mike groans as he remembers catching her at it once early in his time at Graceland. Even then he'd felt a jealous gnawing in his stomach at the sight of her sneaking back into the house, shoes in hand, her obvious sex hair and day old makeup. If he stays here, he's bound to witness it again, and this time the jealousy may kill him. He knows this and yet he remains on the couch. He's such a masochist. He finally loses the battle against exhaustion and falls asleep restlessly on the sofa, knowing when he wakes his heart will be broken.

* * *

"Mike?"

Mike wakes up blearily to see Paige standing over him, shaking him gently.

"Hey. When did you get home?" Her voice is soft and caring, and Mike wants to melt into it until remembers where he is. He fell asleep on the couch in the sitting area upstairs waiting for her to come home after sleeping with someone else. He groans in response, and she smile pityingly down at him.

"You must be exhausted. Couldn't even make it to bed? C'mon." Paige gently brushes his hair back from his face.

She lifts him up off the sofa, and he lets her guide him back to his room. He's determined not to say a word. Not now when he's so tired and so hurt. If he does, he'll just say something he regrets. He'll start another fight, and even if he can't have her as a lover he doesn't want to lose her friendship again. So he just lets her guide him to his room, biting down on his lip to keep from speaking. She helps him to the side of the bed, and then takes a step back and crosses her arms across her chest.

"I'll let you get some sleep then, but I'm glad you're back." Paige tells him. Mike just nods, still not trusting himself to say anything, worried in his exhausted state he may just start crying in front of her which would just be fucking perfect.

He is just going to get in bed when he realizes it's unmade. It was made when he left for the trip. He looks over at her for the first time and really looks at her. Her hair is mussed to the point of bedhead, but not sex-hair, and her face is clean with no makeup on it. She's not wearing clothes from a night out, she's wearing his T-shirt, with a pair of boxers. He looks back to his unmade bed and then back at her, slowly putting two and two together.

"Did you…" Mike's voice cracks and he clears his throat, "Did you sleep in my bed?"

"Um, yeah…" She looks embarrassed as she kicks her foot on the floor.

"So last night, you slept here. That's why you weren't in your bed. You were in mine." Mike groggily puts the logical pieces together much slower than normal.

"I'm sorry. I know that's weird. I just- I didn't expect you home so soon. About the bed… I can change your sheets for you if you want..."

"No, it's fine. I just... What's wrong with your bed?" Mike asks, relieved as he realizes she didn't hook up, but still confused.

"Nothing, I just-" Paige considers lying before finally breaking down and admitting. "It doesn't smell like you."

"That's probably a good thing. I haven't showered in days." Mike says, missing the sentiment she's intending completely.

"Stop it. I think you smell good." Paige says, stepping forward and wrapping him in a hug burying her head in his shoulder, "I missed you."

"I missed you too." Mike is taken off guard by the hug, but tentatively wraps his arms around her waist in response and smells her hair. He stands there for a moment holding her, not really sure what to do. He's so tired he's almost falling over and he knows any move he might make right now could be the wrong one. He wants to kiss her but there is a chance he's misreading the signs. He's so sleep deprived he's not entirely sure this whole thing's not a dream.

"So, I should probably go to sleep." Mike says after a moment of holding her too long.

"Right, you must be exhausted. I'll let you sleep." Paige says, pulling away from him and bouncing back and forth on the balls of her feet nervously.

"Thanks. Goodnight… or good morning I guess." Mike yawns as he takes off his shoes and socks to prepare to fall over into his bed. He starts undoing his belt and then hesitates. He looks down at his undone belt and then back up at her, and decides he will just sleep in his jeans and gets into bed. His sheets are still warm from her body heat and he sighs with contentment. This is what he needs. His bed.

"Right. Sleep well." Paige is almost out the door, but she turns around nervously, "Listen, about what you said on the phone…"

"Yeah, we both said a lot of things." He rolls over so his back is to her. Mike doesn't want to have this conversation with her right now. He knows he'll have to talk about his unrequited love declaration with her eventually, but right now he's so exhausted he just wants to curl up in his bed and sleep for the next two days.

"Right." She says looking down again, and still not leaving. "Good night."

Mike sighs and relaxes into the bed, his eyes fluttering shut.

"I didn't say enough." Paige says from the doorway, like she's gathering all her courage. "It took me off guard, but… I think… I love you too."

Mike's eyes shoot open, but he doesn't dare move.

"Maybe I didn't know the first time we met… but I figured it out eventually, later than I should have, and I should have told you." Paige explains, because now that she's talking she can't seem to stop. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have sprung this on you. I've just been thinking about it ever since you said, what you said, and I- I needed to get it out before some other catastrophe hit... but I know it's not the time. You're tired, I should let you get some sleep."

Paige runs out of the room, leaving Mike in bed, trying to decide in his sleepy brain if that really just happened.

Back in her room Paige is pacing, not able to believe what she just did. She looks down and sees her phone buzzing on her night stand.

"Hi." She answers the phone with a smile, seeing whose number it is.

"I want to take you out on a date." Mike's groggy voice cuts right to the point.

"Ok." Paige agrees quickly.

"It's that easy?" Mike asks surprised.

"You think this was easy?" Paige smirks into the phone, because nothing in Mike and Paige's two year history has been easy.

"Good point." Mike's sleepy words begin to slur together. "Come back to bed."

"Are you sure?" Paige says, now leaning against his doorway talking into the phone.

"Come here." Mike's mouth goes dry as he sees her in the doorway.

She smiles at him, closes the door behind her and then scurries across the room to practically jump into bed beside him. He catches her, pulling her in close and kisses her. She kisses him back, feeling a giddy energy knowing they were finally on the same page.

""If this is a dream, I'm going to be so pissed." Mike groans against her lips.

"It's not a dream." Paige assures him. He kisses her again and again, their hands wandering pulling at the other, until Mike's kisses get slower and sloppy almost like he's drunk. When he stubbornly brings his hand down to tug on her shorts, she laughs at his ambition, and pulls away.

"Don't you need to sleep?" She smiles at him, because even though he's half dead with exhaustion, he's still trying to get into her pants.

"I'm awake now." Mike lies as he's kissing up her ear.

"You need to sleep." Paige laughs softly, "I'll still be here tomorrow."

"Promise?" Mike mumbles sleepily against her shoulder, but he's asleep before he hears her response.

"I promise." Paige kisses his forehead as he softly snores beside her. There's nowhere else she'd rather be.


End file.
